


The Sex of Angels

by j520j



Series: Everybody Loves Aziraphale [5]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Vulva (Good Omens), Cunnilingus, F/M, Penis In Vagina Sex, Porn With Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:01:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21683389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/j520j/pseuds/j520j
Summary: In countries of strong Catholic influence, such as Italy, Portugal, and Spain, there is the sarcastic expression 'discuss the sex of angels' to refer to a discussion that is completely meaningless and unproductive.Anathema finds herself thinking about it on a visit to Aziraphale's shop.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Anathema Device
Series: Everybody Loves Aziraphale [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1463242
Kudos: 10





	The Sex of Angels

"You're kidding!" the girl's eyes widened.

"Quite not, as you can see, my dear." the angel smiled with proud.

"Impossible!"

"It's real."

"No!" Anathema reached out to touch it. “This can't be… the first French edition autographed by Nostradamus himself!”

In the hands of the witch was the book ' _Les Prophéties'_ from 1555, the book of prophecy by the French astrologer Michel de Nostredame. The most famous seer in history. Not for merit, but for his extensive exposure to popular culture, especially as regards disaster prediction.

This edition was incredibly rare and valuable, not only for its spectacular conservation and integrity, but also for the signature and dedication that the Frenchman himself wrote to the book's owner: 'To myne olde friend Azerafel, with beste wishes'.

Flipping through these pages made the girl open her mouth in amazement, the weight of the old paper, the mark of the handmade press, the texture of the rustic leather on the cover, the centennial stitching of the pages. This book was even older than Agnes's, and although its prophecies were far less accurate, it was far more famous and valuable.

“I can hardly believe it! This book is a treasure! Can I read it?”

"Of course, darling!" the angel nodded. "Feel free to take a look in other prophecy books on that shelf, you can read anything you want.”

The witch sat on the old Victorian-era couch the angel had in his flat. She settled the heavy book in her lap and began to take a look. She took photos of some pages with her smartphone to send them to her mother. She would be fascinated with it too.

But reading that issue was not easy. Anathema could speak Spanish and English fluently, as well as some Italian, Portuguese and French. But that book was written in archaic French that was difficult to understand, which made the effort to read it very strenuous.

After completing the first two centuries, Anathema looked up from the pages. She looked around for Aziraphale. Maybe he could help her with the translation of the most difficult passages.

The angel was sitting in the armchair facing her, absorbed in some book. The witch can't help but glance at the man's crotch. His legs were open, his old-fashioned trousers leaving his bulky thighs well demarcated, though the middle was a little broad, undefined. She gave a small smile from the corner of her mouth and wondered silently if the blonde was well endowed.

The two had been dating for a month, but they hadn’t advanced to the intimate part of the relationship yet. So far they had only dinners, strolls in the park, and exchanged a few kisses and caresses, but nothing more than that.

 _Huh, I mean, how do you say to an angel ... na ANGEL! ... that you want to have sex?!_ she thought every time she wanted to propose that they go to bed, but she changed her mind for fear of ruining everything. Maybe lust was something angels didn't feel, and Aziraphale's love was too precious for her to risk losing it with a request that might offend him.

Chuckling, she decided to take her mind off the gutter and go back to the book. But when she looked up again, she saw that Aziraphale was looking straight at her with a smile with the corner of his mouth similar to hers.

"Enjoying the view, lass?" he asked mockingly.

"Ah!" the witch startled and tried to pull herself together. _Congratulations, oh, master of subtlety! He got it!_ she thought, gesturing weakly with her hand. "Sorry! I was somewhere else now, hahaha! Probably thinking about the sex of angels!”

"Huh?"

_Ugh, it got worse, you idiot!_

"No, that's not exactly what I'm talking about, it's ... it's ... err ... it was just na expression!"

Aziraphale raised an eyebrow. Anathema took a long breath to calm her own heart, and blush less, and began to explain:

“I think you don’t know it, because this phrase is more common in Iberian and Mediterranean countries. In these countries 'discussing the sex of angels' is an expression we use to refer to an intellectual effort or meaningless discussion that leads nowhere. Or when we think too much about something unimportant.”

"I know the expression, my dear." the angel closed the book in his hands. “It’s a reference to the tragic event of the fall of Constantinople in 1453. While the Ottomans were attacking the city the Christian authorities were in a council discussing unimportant theological issues, such as whether angels were asexual or not. And if they had sex, whether they were male or female.”

"Ah..." Anathema struggled to smile. “Of course, of course you know! How stupid of me to think you didn't know that. ”

"That I didn't know which is the sex of the angels?"

“N-no! That you didn't know the expression! Uh, I think the English language equivalent is 'how many angels can dance on the head of a pin', isn't it?"

“Yes, it's the English Reform version. Another equally silly discussion. ”Aziraphale set the book he was reading aside. “After all, the answer would be a simple and categorical: none.”

“Oh, sure! After all, no angel can stand in the head of a pin. It’s too small.”

“The size of the dance floor is the least of problems, dear girl. The answer is no because angels don't dance. ”

"No?" Anathema looked genuinely surprised.

“Well, almost none. I dance.” the blonde gestured to himself.

"Really?!" the witch smiled, enjoying the idea. "Why did you never tell me?"

“Because I don't dance very well. I learned gavotte at a late-last-century gentleman's club. And I ended up learning other types of dance, but it's been decades since I— ”

"Neat!" the girl got up from the couch. "Why don't you show me?"

"Uh, now?"

"Come on, let's go!" the girl ran to the old radio in the room. She settled into a station she knew played Latin music twenty-four hours. “Sometimes reading all day is tiring. Let's shake it up a bit!”

"I don't think I can dance this" the angel commented, wincing slightly at the excited sound coming from the device. It was playing Yerba Buena's Guajira, a mix of Cuban music with rap nuances - far away from Aziraphale's musical taste.

“Oh yes, you can! Let's go!” she held out her hand and the blond took it, somewhat uncertain. “When you’re dancing, any rhythm is good! Come on, you'll like it! Do as me!"

In moments Anathema was shaking to the beat of the music, making small gestures for her companion to follow her. Gradually, the angel tried to follow the girl's footsteps. The way she rotated her hips mesmerized him.

"Let’s go, more, come on!" she demonstrated with her steps. “With songs like these there is no right and wrong step. The right thing is to have fun! ”

“Ah, ok! Like that? ” he gave a few awkward body turns that almost made the witch laugh, but she held on to not demotivate him.

"You’re having fun? So that's ok!”

Gradually the angel began to pick up the rhythm of the song and genuinely like it. Anathema was having a great time not only dancing, but seeing Aziraphale dancing. The two bumped a few times, but just laughed and started over. At first they danced a certain distance from each other.

Soon after the radio began to play A Media Luz, Carlos Gardel's classic tango, by Julio Iglesias.

"Oh, this kind of dance is magnificent!" the angel said. “But the steps are very complex. It's completely out of my expertise. ”

“Mine too. But relax! ”Anathema hugged the angel. "Just be with me."

The two began to move at a slow pace, rocked by the melody. The girl's left hand was resting on his waist, holding him close to her body. The sound was dramatic and choppy, with double-meaning Spanish lyrics that only the witch understand. She let out a long breath, wishing for something more.

The two kissed, long and deep. Anathema gently bit the blonde's lower lip. She was breathless with desire, wanted to propose sex, but she was afraid that perhaps he would refuse her offer with disgust. Fortunately, she was spared the agony of doubt.

"Hmmm, my dear girl," the angel murmured, his lips glued to her neck. "Would you like to ... well, do you think this could be a good time to get to know each other better in the 'biblical sense'?"

The girl widened her eyes and grinned, digging her nails into Aziraphale's back.

"Yah!" she said, almost breathless. “Yes, I want, my angel! I want now!"

The blond kissed her and lifted her in his arms, carrying her toward the bedroom. _Finally!_ she thought, gripping his shoulders tightly.

The angel sat on the edge of the bed, Anathema in his lap. She kissed him on the jaw, neck, collarbone. She unbuttoned his waistcoat, unzipped his shirt and began to explore his torso, running her hands over the blond chest. The angel held her gently by the hair as she removed his clothes, exploring each new space of exposed skin.

As Anathema unzipped the angel's belt and began to remove his trousers, Aziraphale's right hand, the one whose golden ring on his little finger glinted, interrupted her for a moment.

"What do you prefer?"

"Huh?"

"What do you prefer?" the angel repeated, a soft smile on his face, flushed with excitement. “A cock or a pussy?”

The witch blinked a few times until she understood the meaning of the question.

"Wait, you mean I can ... choose… ?!"

"Yes." Aziraphale lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it. “The discussion about the sex of angels in medieval times was a valid curiosity. The most appropriate answer is that we can have every possible sex. Male, female, hermaphrodite, cis, trans, no sex ... whatever you want.”

Anathema has always considered herself a heterosexual woman. Well, maybe bi-curious since she had an experience with a woman in college. For a moment she visualized Aziraphale as a woman, with breasts, long hair and perhaps a softer voice, and didn’t like the idea. She liked the angel's male image, his hairy chest, his strong shoulders and the smell of aftershave on his neck.

But the various possibilities the angel offered her piqued her curiosity. A lot.

"Can you change anytime you want?" she asked, her face flushed with the ideas that welled up in her mind. "Like, the whole body or just some parts?"

“Well, changing the whole body takes a while. But if it's just the genitals, it doesn't take more than a minute. ”

“So keep your body like that, just like that. I want you this way. ”

"It's ok. What about…? ” he gestured to his groin.

It took the witch a few seconds to process the answer as her face turned the color of a strawberry.

"A pussy," Anathema said, almost in a whisper. "Then we change, how about?"

"Your wish is my command!"

The angel guided the girl's hand into his pants, where above-normal heat formed in his groin. Anathema could already smell female arousal in the air, the same as she felt in herself when she masturbated. As her fingers go through the pubic hair at the base of his belly, she can feel the wetness and the wrinkled touch of the folds of a vulva.

She bent to kiss him on the mouth and her fingers began to get more invasive. Being a woman, she knew how to arouse a clit, though perhaps with Aziraphale the technique should be different. But when the angel moaned during the kiss with her touch, the witch knew she was on the right track.

They were both completely naked when they lay in bed. The angel gave the girl a deep kiss, positioning her over his body and then giving her the tip to turn in the opposite position.

When her hip was above his face, his thin lips met the large lips of her middle legs. The angel's tongue danced over the folds and then rose to the girl's ass, making a wet path with the saliva. Teeth lightly brushing tender skin and the tip of his nose navigating through black hair. His tongue returned to the folds and began to dance over the little pink bud that stiffened above the girl's exposed entrance.

Anathema was so absorbed in the pleasure the angel was giving her that she almost forgot to return it. Brushing Aziraphale's thighs apart, she positioned her head between them and began to taste his arousal, sliding her tongue gently over the edges. With her thumbs she exposed his entrance and penetrated her tongue.

The moans of pleasure began to grow louder for both. The witch inserted two fingers into the angel, which slipped with great ease. His hands were bigger and his fingers were were fatter, allowing him to massage her entrance with more force and intensity.

Anathema she didn't want to be left behind then she pushed three fingers inside him, then four. _Oh God, he's so wet I think I could put my whole hand inside him!_ she thought, proud of herself and thinking that she should be as wet as him.

Aziraphale's inner muscles were tightening and she continued to push her fingers, as her mouth was busy only moaning, sensing that she herself was close too. At one point, after a louder exclamation, the girl knew he had come - especially when his massive thighs almost crushed her head. The reaction of his body made Anathema climax as well, digging her nails into the angel's groin.

"Ah, ah... lass...!" he breathed heavily, holding her buttocks tightly. Her pussy rested on his chest, wet and throbbing after coming. "For y-you... you have such proficiency in this... I-I suppose the reports of female orgies at Sabbath parties are true?"

"Heh, idiot," she said, but gently, as she stood and turned to stand with her head next to his. "Most witchcraft books are written by men, did you know that?"

"You're professing to a convert, dear girl." he kissed her and brushed the unruly curls that fell over her face. "Well, and now? Do you want me to change equipment? ”

"Oh, we're all in the mood, huh?" Anathema hugged him tightly. "Yes, my angel. Sure!"

Within seconds, she began to feel something bulging and poking at her thigh. Aziraphale remained with his eyes closed as the new part of his anatomy manifested. His cock had already manifested erect.

 _Yes, he is well endowed!_ thought the witch, having her first question of the day answered. And before the blond even opened his eyes, she went down to him.

It was a bit sudden and Aziraphale was startled, but soon he began to relax and enjoy the moist heat of her mouth enveloping his cock. The angel lay on his back for easy access and began to arch his back as he felt Anathema's tongue sliding down his length to gently suck the top.

Her hands slid down his massive thighs, leaving discreet welts through her fingernails. His moans began to growl and he made her stop for a moment. Slowly Anathema climbed on him and, inch by inch, allowed the member to enter her.

"Ah!" Aziraphale exclaimed when he felt he had been sheathed to the hilt. He held his breath, gripping the sheets of the bed, and looked toward the smiling human. “M-my dear girl, my dear woman ... please, ride me! P-please, tame me like I'm a wild horse! ”

"Let's see if you can kick it!" Anathema smiled, moving her hips forward. The first thrusts were slow and deep, slowly acquiring rhythm.

The angel reached out, one hand resting on the witch's hip and the other holding her left breast. She put one hand on the bookseller's blond chest while the other caressed her right breast. Anathema began to lean in, allowing his cock to reach her insides diagonally. Aziraphale took the hint and turned sideways, taking one of her legs and holding it up.

His thrusts were firm and deep, the way the witch liked. She buried her face in his shoulder, taking small bites of light skin as she moaned louder and louder. Her hands clutched his back, damp with sweat. And as they were positioned there, Anathema began to feel an abnormal heat coming from that area.

"Ah ... ah-Anaaaathe—!" He exclaimed, causing the girl's hands to lose support on his back when something manifested from it.

The angel's wings sprang from his shoulder blades, pushing the bedside table and cushion behind his back. A few white, white feathers flew across the room, filling the room with a soft light that came from the divine miracle that had manifested its wings on the physical plane.

“ZiiiiraAAAAH!” that angelic vision, coupled with the sensation of the angel's seed filling her insides, made the witch exclaim and come, her insides holding the angel's limb tightly within her.

Exhausted, they both hugged for a few seconds, breathing heavily and catching their breath. Aziraphale breathed a satisfied sigh and kissed the human's forehead, sliding out of her slowly.

“So, dearest? Did you find the answer satisfactory?”

"Hmmm... what?" she asked, already sleepy.

"The answer to the centennial question about the sex of the angels!" he smiled comically.

"Oh, hush." she kissed him on the mouth to shut him up and be spared any joke about his typical, incomprehensible, English humor. "You angels sometimes talk too much."

Chuckling, Aziraphale just nodded. He cradled her head on his shoulders and they both fell into a peaceful sleep soon after, wrapped in his white wings.


End file.
